Jul 11
1

How to tell a partner that you have herpes?

14 Comments
herpes
tay asked:


I recently found out I have Herpes 2 virus. I know that it is not the worst thing in the world to have, but it is certainly among one of the most embaressing. I am young and still living my life. How do i go about telling those that i’m interested in about the virus? I’m advised to continue living my life how i would normally,and to even involve myself in monogamous sexual relationships, but how when getting close to a partner, should you tell them? Of course i know to not have intercourse when the outbreaks occur and that i should always use protection. But how do you go on telling someone?

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Posted in Herpes by admin 14 Comments

14 Responses to "How to tell a partner that you have herpes?"

  • ruthiecrue2 says:
    July 4, 2011 at 5:50 am
    Reply

    Just tell them the truth………….

  • Meeza says:
    July 7, 2011 at 5:36 am
    Reply

    Be honest. If the person cares about you, he/she will understand. If the person does not understand, it’s not the right person for you. A potential date told me about his status and it didn’t matter to me at all. I respected him for his honesty and it didn’t make a difference.

  • Lillian S. Phx Arizona says:
    July 8, 2011 at 12:44 am
    Reply

    become very educated on the topic so that you may proply discuss this topic with your partners. hopfully you will get into a managomous relationship and the only time you will have to worry about it is out break. it isnt the worst thing in the world but being able to answer questions will ensure that your partners wont be wared off. good luck

  • sishakara says:
    July 11, 2011 at 11:20 am
    Reply

    become celibate. then there is little need to share.

  • ☻♫§weetTart§amantha♫☻ says:
    July 11, 2011 at 8:06 pm
    Reply

    you need to just sit them down and tell them that is going to be the ultimate test for you to find out if they truely care for you. yes they may be afraid to be intimate with you at first so maybe take them with you to a doctors appointment and have him/her explain the risks and how to prevent the spread of them. i give you a lot of courage to continue with your life i dont know how i would deal with news like that so good for you

  • ljn says:
    July 12, 2011 at 11:43 pm
    Reply

    Its not easy but do tell them. If that person does not love you enough to work through the problem then move on. Do always use protection anyway.

    Just say something like ” I am really interested in you. I want to be up front with everything. I want you to know before we go any further in this relationship that I do have herpes 2.”

    Do use protection because sometimes its hard to tell when the outbreak starts.

  • cailieco says:
    July 13, 2011 at 12:58 am
    Reply

    When things start to head in that direction l think honesty is the best policy. Just be up front and tell them the truth at least then you will know where you stand and so do they.

  • smile>believeme says:
    July 15, 2011 at 12:10 am
    Reply

    just tell tlk

  • Ann C says:
    July 18, 2011 at 6:19 am
    Reply

    So what are you suppose to do? “Hi my name is _________. I have Herpes 2. Would you like to go out with me?”

    yes I know that was a bit blunt. My point to it though is that you can’t just spit out “I have Herpes”

    I have two suggestions.

    1) Join a STD Support group. The people there will best know how to address this situation because of personal experience.

    2) When telling the person you are interested in that you have herpes, start off by telling him you need to talk to him about something personal. Then explain maybe that you met someone, fell in love, (whatever your case may be) and that person gave you something that you have to live with for the rest of your life. Then tell him what you have. Let him know that he is not under any pressure to continue seeing you and if he does choose to see you, there is no pressure to have intercourse. If he sticks around and intercourse becomes inevitable, then discuss how you two will protect him and keep him from contracting the disease.

  • Michael Eisenour says:
    July 19, 2011 at 5:26 am
    Reply

    stick your penis inside of them and let your worries go away!

  • Rain S says:
    July 22, 2011 at 2:02 pm
    Reply

    You should also know that you CAN spread the virus when you show no symptoms… it is called A-symptomatic viral shedding. You should always be up front and honest with anyone you plan on being intimate with and let them decide if it is worth the risk or not. Also, always stay on your medication!

  • Kevin O says:
    July 24, 2011 at 6:01 am
    Reply

    You wait until you know the person really well, and it comes to the point that you and this person want to be sexually active with eachother. When the subject of sex comes up, you just tell the person that you care about them and have to let them know about this virus that you have. Let them know that you are not always contagious, and that it’s like a cold sore. If the person really loves you, the herpes won’t be that big of a deal to them.

  • SCUBAAAAAAAAA says:
    July 25, 2011 at 10:39 pm
    Reply

    turn gay???

  • openwaterswimgal says:
    July 27, 2011 at 7:41 am
    Reply

    The main thing is to stay calm and collected when telling. Give them the facts. Many people don’t even know what herpes is. So you have to go slowly. Tell them you were tested for STDs and you discovered you have herpes type 2. Do they know what that is? See how much they know about it. Have some information ready to give them. You can download stuff from the Internets about it. (Try westoverheights handbook — just Google it, you should be able to find it.)

    You should be prepared to use suppressive medication to protect your partners from infection. Also use condoms. Talk to your doctor about a prescription for medication. You can take it daily, or you can take it when you feel outbreaks coming on. If you are sexually active with a herpes-negative partner, it is best to use it daily to protect them.

    Your sex life is not over because you have herpes! I had a 4-year relationship with a man who had herpes, and we took precautions, and I did not contract the virus from him. There are people out there who will date you, sleep with you, have relationships with you, whether they have herpes or not. What is important is your honesty, and all the other qualities that make you such a great person — your caring, kindness, compassion, and love of life.

    One more thing to keep in mind – herpes is very common. Very common. One out of 4 people are walking around with it. That’s 25% of the sexually active population. That’s millions of people. You are not alone. It is entirely possible that the partner you talk to about your herpes also has it. The first thing they need to do, if they agree to be sexual with you, is to be tested to see if they have it.

    Keep us posted!

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